I need a big sign that says: I don't know what I'm doing yet next year...

I think that myself along with numerous other college seniors feel this way. Everyone wants to know: WHAT ARE YOUR FUTURE PLANS? Well I don't have any yet! And guess what? I'm not worried. Who decided that if we didn't graduate with a job we were doomed? We don't need to map out our future starting May 22nd (day after graduation). I don't know what I want to do, but I do know this:

- I want to take some time off to relax. As if I do so much with my life now? I'm talking stress free pool time. No final papers, no gross east fifth street house that i am sick of living in, no drama.
- I loathe the thought of sitting in a cubicle. This might be delaying my job hunt.
- I want to do something creative where I can write.
- I know that whatever job I take isn't set in stone, and I can follow more than one path.
- Whatever I do choose, I have to be really passionate about or I won't put a lot of effort into it. That's just me.

So come time for my joint graduation party with my cousin Brian who goes to University of Vermont I think maybe I'll make us both signs that say: I'm not sure what I'm doing yet, but I'm sure I'll figure it out along the way.

Should I do it?

Back in September 2006, I applied to be on the staff of The Brown and White, Lehigh's newspaper, for one last semester for my journalism major. One of my editor friends told me that they were thinking about adding and sex and relationships column and asked if I would be interested. "Sure," I said, "why not?" My friends and I sit around talking candidly about this stuff all the time, not to mentioned that one of my favorite shows ever is "Sex and the City." Carrie, the main character is a sex columnist and I pretty much idolize her, as silly as it is. My friends and I watch the show and listen to the questions they ponder and the situations they go through and we just crack up and are marveled at how relatable it all seems.

So I said yes. The only condition was that they wanted to do it under a pseudonym. They came up with the name "Allie Amore." This way, if it was controversial, I wouldn't have to take any of the heat directly. I'm slowly learning how to take constructive criticism, or simply any criticism at all. I wrote the first two columns and when the third one came around, I was told that the higher-ups on the paper said I would have to reveal myself because The Brown and White didn't support anonymity. I wasn't sure if I wanted to continue, scared of what people might think or say. As random and awkward as this was, I emailed a popular blogger turned author, Aaron Karo, about my situation asking for his advice. I'm not sure what prompted me to do this, probably one of my random insomniac thoughts, but much to my surprise, he responded! He gave great advice and told me that in order to be a writer, one has to take risks and part of that is building their name. So I did it.

Yes, I realize it's just a column for a college newspaper, but to me it is a stepping stone. A way of learning about my generation and culture, as well as myself and what I am capable of. I decided to continue the column through second semester when one of my friends became the editor and asked if I would. So far, I've had one come out about every month. Whenever they are published, I email the link to my family and close friends from home. It was an awkward but hilarious moment, having one of my best friend's mothers quote one of the lines from my article back to me.

Some people think what I write is provocative, I think it's reality. If people don't want to realize that this is what our romantic culture is coming to than they should read what I have to say. I'm a liberal person who is very open and honest and I enjoy writing what I write.